My 39th summer

WOW - that is a hard title to type! As I was walking with my good friend Allison today she said "So, how is your 39th summer going?" I gasped. Oh MY GOD! I am 39. I forget that A LOT. Not just because I have a 1.5 and a 3.5 year old and basically went without sleeping a solid night for about 2 years of my life. Sleep deprivation will do things to your mind - that's why they use it in war.
I know there are many things I have forgotten - mostly people/students names, some memories (which might be good especially if they are family related!). But, how on earth do I forget my age? I guess it is because the majority of people I converse, work, or spend time with are younger than me, and so it is easy for me to assume their age until there is an 80's reference. This happens with my husband A LOT. He is 6 years younger than me and so if a particular song comes on I'll say "Man, I remember roller skating to this" and he'll be like "I remember riding my tricycle to this!?"
I feel I should set some goals at this point. I have decided to share them with you. For example, I want to lose the last bit of Grant/nursing weight. That would be a good 15 pounds. My dream is to wear a size 8 again, but I'll be happy with a 10 which is 2 sizes smaller than I am now! This weight loss feels eminent. Like, if I don't do it NOW, then I won't ever lose it. To coin a phrase - it's now or never. To achieve this goal I have already started eating better and less ( I am guilty of stress and boredom eating) and exercising more. It is all about the math - less calories in = less calories to work off. Plus I feel better about myself when I am smaller because for 33 years I was petite. I can actually remember at one point in my life being put on a diet to gain weight!
Mostly, I don't feel 39. There are mornings like today where the whole left side of my body is aching. Maybe it has to do with the excess weight. But mostly I feel less than 39. Perhaps it is because I have small children, or I teach kids, but it just shocks me to hear that I am 39. I'm not sure where I was going with this, maybe it's because I am 39~!